It’s happened. They said yes.

Your first date (for men)

A lot of emotions are happening right now. The angel on your shoulder says ‘it will all be ok, you’re a good guy, she’s going to like you’. The devil saying ‘you are going to fuck this up’. Don’t worry, help is at hand.

Fear, excitement, anticipation, but the fear can take control of all of the good things when you are meeting someone properly, you know, not like for work or on your phone or whatever. This is you and her, on one place….. gulp.

When you plan it out, it can help with everything, calm the fear, and you may even enjoy it. Maybe….


Cleanliness is next to sexiness.

  • Shower right before going out
  • Shave/trim beard/Eyebrows. Not shaping them, not sure why any man does that, I mean trimming them
  • Nose and ear hair… yeah right – check, you do
  • Moisturise lightly (think Nivea for men) to make sure you don’t have dry bits of skin flying off in to her face (and it makes your skin smell really nice)
Cleanliness is next to sexiness on your first date
Not like this cat

Not like this cat

Clothes for your first date

  • Clean clothes, not those skanky jeans you can’t remember when were last washed. I mean clean, and ironed if necessary. Don’t please God put creases in your jeans…
  • Shirt, nice jumper, not hoodie
  • Very simple dress code – light jeans dark top, dark jeans light top
  • White trainers – nice and clean, not fussy or showy

Finishing Touches

  • Cologne – go light, two sprays on torso is best. It lasts longer and is not overpowering. Spray on to the left and right top of chest and it works for hours
  • Hair – best with a fresh trim at the barbers, light styling, don’t style like you have been standing in the arctic and can snap off at any moment. Grease = bad, Light style = good
Finishing Touches on your first date
Booking her uber

Booking her uber

Get Ready

  • The point of all of this is what she doesn’t notice – everything is as it should be, you have made a real effort without looking like you made a real effort
  • Be early. Make sure you are early. A girl kept waiting is waiting to go home. It means you don’t value her. Get there early, waiting to greet her. Make Sure !

Wear a smile

It is the most attractive thing about you.Trust me, stop looking at how fabulous your nose is, or how wonky your eyes are. I asked a friend of mine many years ago why every single women smiles at him everywhere we went and he said, ‘because I smile at them, they smile back’. Genius. Maybe not like him…

Wear a smile on your first date
So she turned up

So she turned up

Thats all good then? Wrong. What are you going to talk about? Have you seen First Dates and the slow car crash where you are cringing for them through the screen? Prepare topics of conversation:

  • Anything happening in the news (not murders of kidnappings, that is just sending all sorts of wrong)
  • Ed Sheeran’s 312 latest releases


  • Boris Johnson looks like the neighbours cat
  • You normally have dreads but your wanker barber heard the guy next to you and now you have marine core #1 buzz cut
  • How you ordered new jeans to come out on this date but as you went to the toilet earlier you realised these are womens cos they don’t have a button fly
Body language
Make a joke

Body Language

So prep your conversation and listen when she talks.  Listen and respond to what she’s saying and…

  • Never ever talk over her. If you thought she had finished, and she had not, apologise and smile, and let her continue
  • Uncross your arms, lean forward and sit up straight
  • Smile, enjoy, relax
  • Make a joke – but never about her. Never. About you. But maybe not the story about how Dave tattooed your ass with a compass that one time…
  • You don’t touch your phone at all – leave it off if possible. Its just good manners, but it shows she is your 100% focus, phones tell you everything that has happened, thats history and boring

It’s going well, what next?

  • She hasn’t left – tick
  • She’s not looking around (boredom)
  • And she isn’t looking at her phone
  • If she’s touching her hair – could be dry scalp, but could be that she is in to you – lets hope the latter
  • Conversation is flowing and you are both relaxed and are laughing along
  • When the date is over, ask if you can see her again. Don’t make any presumptions about it going somewhere. Play it cool to make the next date before you anything happens on this one
  • Text her once to make sure she is home safely. Once. Yes really. If she replies, say goodnight and looking forward to next time. And then there will be a next time
Bad date

This is BAD

Good date

This is GOOD